Beastmaster (1982), Exterminators of the Year 3000 (1983), Dead Heat (1988)

Beastmaster is the next movie Dan Coscarelli made after Phantasm (see earlier entry). It's a light sword-and-sandals little movie, with a couple surprises, but nothing major. It's enjoyable, and I remember it being on cable a lot when I was younger - apparently this is the reason it's obtained cult classic status - but I can't recommend it over other barbarian fare like Conan the Barbarian or Krull. 

Marc Singer plays Dor, the Beastmaster - a man born with the ability to speak with animals. The best parts of the movie involve his animal friends - a hawk, two ferrets, and a black tiger. I sincerely wish the movie revolved around them instead of the rather stupid people. 

Another nice surprise - he encounters a tough-as-nails man played to the hilt by John Amos (!). Seeing the dad from Good Times in fantasy clothing, kicking ass with a staff ... well, it has to be seen to be believed (and enjoyed). 

The plot is quite dumb - evil faux-sorcerer sacrifices children for ... no reason? Dor and his animals get fed up, overthrow sorcerer (played by Rip Torn!) and his inept minions. An attractive slave girl meets Dor, as is par for the course in these movies. It's ok. The animals steal the show. 

This is a Z-grade Italian/Spanish knock-off of Mad Max. In the year 3000, Earth is a desert wasteland with a serious water shortage, and yet gasoline is apparently not a problem. Men and women drive around in cool cars and attack each other for water. Eventually a child appears who promises to show them a Great Water Revolution, but can they overcome their crude origins to follow him?

This is ... not good. I had no idea there were so many Mad Max clones until I began this '80s movie quest, and this is probably the worst one I've seen. The main "hero" is a real asshole, trying to rip off the child until the female lead basically blackmails him into doing the right thing. The kid isn't bad. The best and most likable actor is the former astronaut who first befriends the kid and gets the kid super drunk (!). 

This one is strictly for genre afficianados only - if you can't get enough Mad Max in your life, watch this. Everyone else - steer clear. 

I liked this a lot more than I thought I would. Dead Heat is about zombie, but in the most modern way - rich people have figured out a way to prolong their lives after death. They test the process out on dead thugs, who then rob businesses (I guess that's how the rich stay rich?). Treat Williams and Joe Piscopo are the cops tasked with figuring out the situation and putting it to an end.

But there's a twist! Treat Williams is killed a third of the way into the movie, and is then turned into a zombie by his partner and his ex (!). Then he and Piscopo continue to solve the crimes - cop and zombie cop! There are a few more twists - and a nice one right at the end - and this movie never outstays its welcome.

Keep a lookout for Vincent Price in a perfect role as the rich man who first perfects the zombification. He's priceless (pun intended). And Piscopo, as maligned as his humor often is, is exactly right as the comedy half of the cop duo. It might be my favorite movie of his.

If you ever wished Lethal Weapon had a lot more zombie action, this movie is for you. Recommended!